First off let me come out by saying November has been one of my more inconsistent months.. Ups and downs everywhere, not my best stuff at work, at home, my spiritual life.. the social life has tapered off a bit, not really trying to put any energy in that part of my life right now.. I only say that because I overlook the rest of my life, priorities aside, when i TRY to focus on relationships and friendships, instead of just remaining in honest and pure fellowship with everyone..
I wont say I’ve been distracted, but complacent, and stagnant could be used to describe this month.. but even in my stagnant and stubborn complacency, I’ve still been blessed by God overcoming doubts, realizing that in Him I’m able to achieve any and everything I put my mind to, AND I realize even when I feel like giving up, I can still overcome, and in the end no matter what, HE IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE IN CONTROL.
Second, God has been good just in the simple fact that He just does what only what He does. (go with me for a second) In my SMALL mind of thinking, He’s like that road team in a big game, they hang around in the 4th quarter, waiting for a chance to pull off the upset… the relation, even when we think we everything in hand just on our own, God comes in and shows us that all alone , He was the One calling the shots, (now that example may have not made sense to anyone, thats just the mind I have, not down grading God in any respect, because my thoughts aren’t and will never be like His, but my point is that GOD WILL ALWAYS BE THERE….
and that brings me to my next point, sometimes I lose sight of that… lose sight of knowing and resting on the simple fact that God is always there for me, when I need Him the most, when I’m in trouble, or when I just want to shout and rejoice, or even when I’m just chill and content.
when I say this has not been my most consistent month, and past few weeks.. I meant spiritually. I mean I’ve managed to get back in the gym for the last week in a half or so, and have good workouts, hoop it up with the guys at the gym, get some hours at my old job, and start training at my new one. but its spiritually where I’ve fallen off. missed a couple of Sundays at church because I was “tired” and have some slip ups with my sin struggles, …na wait, forget it, I’ve fallen, more than once. and I hate it because I know I’m better than this.. but that’s just it, the reason I fall from time to time, is because I THINK I’m better than this, I can’t think I’M better than this.. I have to fully completely and truly believe without a doubt in my mind, that HE is better than this, and overcome my stupid sins, because HE overcame this world… ugh this makes me upset, but at no one but myself, no tv show, website, song, person, or any other type of ‘external’ influence can be to blame, but myself.
But will I beat myself about it? Nope.
Will I get back in the Word and go harder and harder for Christ? you bet!
For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world–our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?
-1 John 5:4-5 [ESV]