Expectations..

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Your..

Life. Career. Yourself. finishing school. Relationships. No matter how you look at it, everything in your life has expectations. rather you expect something from it or it expects something from you.

Your managers expect the best out of you. You expect yourself to perform well on your job.

Your professors expect your all on every assignment. You expect yourself to finish strong and earn that degree.

Your parents expect you to clean your room. You expect to move out the house by the time you turn 18…

All of these have equal expectations. But what about friendships? Relationships?

What do you expect..

from a friend or best friend? Boyfriend/Girlfriend/Spouse? etc. Are there any expectations or do you let the chemistry and continuity between yall tell the story? When you place a title on a relationship or friendship, you’re placing an expectation on that person. That’s where you have to be careful. In a significant relationship, there are specific expectations for the two people involved, they both have the expectation to be honest with each other, and to love and respect each other.

 Can the same be said about an ordinary friendship? Close friends like siblings, best friends all your life, or instant friends from a random conversation, expectations of a friendship does vary, depending on the level of the friendship, the trust level, and overall how two people relate to each other, their accountability, and real importantly, their reliability. A close friend can identify with your story and offer advice. A best friend lives the story with you, but an acquaintance is only someone you may share the brief details with, if that. 

The quality of friendship isn’t justified by the “title” you place on them (best friend, close friend, etc.), but from the experiences you share with them. 

Overrated or Overreaction? 

Overreacting on your friendship can happen when something about that person catches your attention and you think the friendship is over or in jeopardy just because that one thing happened. Something was said, or done to offend the other person in some way, but it only happened one time out of a lifetime it feels like that the two of you have been friends. That’s an overreaction.

Overrated is another thing. You think of a friendship with someone to be the best thing that has ever happened to you, it starts well, have a lot in common, so you think things are going well, why not award the friendship a title  like “close friends”, or  “best friends”, or “inseparable” But placing that title comes with… an expectation. Expecting that person to do… more than what they really are doing… giving them a title, but they don’t live up to it… that’s overrated.

The Reality..

The reality of it is when something is officially ruled or thought of as ‘overrated’ , it means that particular thing, or person, or friendship had the potential to be really good, and still does, but for whatever reason isn’t meeting the expectations. An overrated friendship is when you expect so much out of someone and they either let you down with a broken promise, lost of trust, go behind your back, or even something simple as, not even count you as a priority in their lives… and we’ve all been there before..

Don’t consider someone an priority, when they only consider you as an option. 

Are you expecting too much of them? Are you overreacting? Is the friendship overrated?

Make it personal

I ask myself these questions because i feel that i have overreacted about a friendship before but I’ve also experienced what i call an overrated friendship and/or relationship. I expected too much from someone and ended up being let down, lost respect for them, couldn’t trust them, or even felt they weren’t the person i thought they were, based on the title we gave that friendship/relationship. Truth be told though, I’ve been on both sides of this the crazy thing is I still admire this person or these people, and I know God brought these people into my life for a reason.. but what I’ve come to find out is I’ve been relying too much on people, and not enough on myself, and surely not enough on God.! and because I rely too much on people, i end up overrating the relationship, expecting too much from them…

I have to be careful of that because if i overrate my friendship with someone, i run the risk of  having an underrated experience with them. 

Bottom line is this: If the friendship or relationship is ‘overrated’, then  you MUST lower the expectations of that person, and raise your dependency on GOD.  After all He expects the most out of us, so why not expect the most out of Him?? 

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